Venting to reflect

I found out yesterday that J has a double ear infection.  He has been teething for a while and his 7th tooth cut through on Friday.  But since then he has lost his appetite.  I stayed home with him over the past two days and finally took him to see the doctor.  He was so lethargic on Sunday, he could barely pick up his head.  With a 104.3 temp we knew we weren't going out, despite the very mild weather, we spent the sunny day indoors and cuddled.

There were moments when J would be hungry and want to poke through his cabinet.  Yes, we have a cabinet designated for all of his snacks.  I helped him up on the counter so he could pick what he wanted, but when it came to actually eating something, he got mad. 

He would stand in the kitchen and scream.  Not a playful scream.  He had tears and the screams were meant for pain.  I cannot imagine what he was feeling like but his expression was painful to watch.  All I could do was give him some Mummy hugs and hope he wasn't mad at me for the way he was feeling.

So when I found out he had a double ear infection, along with 3 teeth cutting any day, the poor child needed help.  As soon as I got his medicine I gave him a dose.  We had a small bite to eat for lunch and he was off to take an early afternoon nap.  He slept for almost 3 hours and when he woke up he actually look rested.  He was still grumpy but I could tell the antibiotics were already working.

The doctor had asked me if I could tell if he had an ear infection.  "Doesn't he pull on his ears?"  No.  He sort of pokes at them but he likes to acknowledge his ears from time to time as a game so it didn't occur to me that he could have been pulling at them. 

This morning we had to wake J up and he was still a little groggy when my husband was putting on his shoes.  J slept soundly throughout the whole night and we even got a good nights rest.  I was pleasantly surprised to see J acting like his silly self again.  I missed my silly putty.  He still has moments where he cannot communicate with me and will just scream.  It seems that he has discovered how screaming can relieve a lot of different emotions that he is unable to communicate.  But he also is known for walking around the house giggling. 

It's been a long weekend for me, a whole 4 days with a kid who has a bad head ache.  I'm back at work today and it's only been a few hours but I miss him like crazy.  Through all the bad moments we had, the ones I remember the most are when we colored (cah-cah), read books (boog), and made play-doh.

My silly putty

Being a big boy and mixing the play-doh

"OOOHHHH"

One of our happier moments from our long day

Out to Lunch---March

I went out to lunch today, by myself and sat in a local cafe with a sandwich and cup of coffee.  The corner table by the window was available so I sat there: Me, Myself, and I.  The cafe wasn't too crowded, but there was enough foot traffic coming for a cup of joe and others walking on the sidewalk while peeking in through the windows.

I wasn't there long, but it was long enough for me to feel like I had a moi moment.  I wish I had a magazine to thumb through but it was equally pleasant to just sit there and look out the window.  There were kids in the next room who would toddle out into the main entry way and look around, look at me and stop to just stare.  With my mouth full of sandwich, I would smile at the young girl and her little brother.  But I think they wanted to hop up to my table because it was elevated from the floor they were on.  But they were pleasant and turned and paraded through the cafe while their Mum tossed their garbage from lunch and collected their belongings.  The whole time I was missing J and wish I didn't have to be at work today.  But it's Friday so I spent most of my time at the cafe wondering what fun plans we could accomplish this weekend.  The weather is supposed to be extremely spring-like so I hope to make it to a local playground.

My week in general has left me feeling exhausted.  I need to schedule more 'me' moments throughout the week.  There are a few things I enjoy doing that help me escape from my routine, even if it's for 15 minutes.  I think every Mum needs to schedule their time and make sure it's a task that can be completed. 

Lately I've been enjoying my book and read a chapter or two.  Sometimes at night I'll try and read an hour to have my fill.  I think back and wonder how I managed to read an hour and have it only feel like 15 minutes?  Lately, it's been easy to do.  Another thing that helps me relax and feel restored is coloring.  I have done this even before my son was born, so it sounds silly to realize how long I have done this, but for me it has helped me feel grounded. 

I wish I could climb these trees and read a book

Suzanne at the Mother Huddle also wrote about similar experiences that have helped reconnect her soul.  I think sometimes we forget how important it really is to remember who we are as a person.  My patience has run thin this week and I'm exhausted.  This week, I have forgotten who I am and what ingredients make me. 

Next time, I'll need to keep some bread crumbs with me so I can find my way back.

Show Mummy your teeth!

If I ask J to smile, he doesn't know what I'm talking about.  But to ask him where his teeth are, that's a different story.  He'll show those pearly whites to me every single time.  It's like he's proud of them, as though he found them somewhere like burried treasure. 

Showing off those teeth

J's been teething again.  It seems like we have a short period where he has no drool and I take a big sigh of relief.  For now.  Teething is so torturous for my little man.  He is always developing a fever of some kind along with a very runny nose.  We're constantly running around wiping his face with a tissue.  He has come to learn about these tissues and now likes to help us (him) out by wiping his nose all by himself.  What a big boy!

But those teeth, they really are something magical because they put this huge grin on J's face.  It's just too cute for words and he knows it.  So yesterday morning we had a mini photo shoot in our kitchen.  He insisted on flashing those teeth at the camera, despite the crazy double flash that was in his face.

The first picture and he was really posing for this.

Oh the light is starting to bother him but he's determined to show his teeth

Now he's just being goofy

'Alright Ma... I think this is enough'

'Really, we can stop now'

Yup, even with me he just can't keep those eyes open.  I really need to figure out how to use my camera!